


Always White

by lesyeuxverts



Category: Harry Potter - Rowling
Genre: Forced Bonding, M/M, Weddings, harry/teddy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-14
Updated: 2009-11-14
Packaged: 2017-10-02 19:20:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lesyeuxverts/pseuds/lesyeuxverts
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry has to marry Teddy. Just to save him, of course. He isn't a dirty old man lusting after his godson - he isn't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Always White

**Author's Note:**

> Written for entrenous88 in the first round of hp_cross_fest. Warnings for forced bonding and semi-public sex.

The bride wore white, and it was the sole spot of brightness in the dim church. Stark and virginal. Harry's heart thudded as he waited by the altar.

Teddy came up the aisle, his hair flashing through a rainbow of colors. Tonks had looked like this on her wedding day, had smiled like this, and the fact that Harry was old enough to know that, the fact that he remembered it–

That was more than enough to damn him.

\-----

Harry couldn't believe what Andromeda had said. _Marry Teddy_ \- no.

The sunlight came through the window panes and fell in a crazy-quilt pattern on the kitchen table. It shone on Andromeda's dark hair, giving her a faint halo. Harry blinked until his eyes watered and the halo disappeared.

"I – I can't," he said.

"I know that you prefer women," Andromeda said, refilling Harry's teacup and passing him the sugar, "but surely you could manage once, if only for Teddy's sake.

"According to Ministry guidelines, it doesn't have to be penetrative sex. Any sexual act will do to consummate the marriage, and you need to–"

"Andromeda, he's practically my son."

"Not by blood. Not by any measure that matters."

"Remus and Tonks–"

"Would have wanted you to keep their son safe."

Harry shifted in his seat, refusing to look at Andromeda. The thought of Teddy tied to him in marriage, Teddy in his bed – he was practically the age of Harry's own children. He was Harry's godson. To be bound to him, to marry him…

"Harry, you must be able to see that there's no other option. You have to–"

No other option – no other option. The words echoed through the kitchen and the world spun and shattered. Harry's fingers were drenched with lukewarm tea, the cup cracked on the table. It was cracked open like an egg, lying in pieces and the cracks gleamed whitely, like china bones laid bare to the world.

One egg cracked and another was set in its place, still whole and flawless. One marriage replaced another – one beloved face took the place of another. Harry _couldn't._

Harry shook the tea from his fingers, watching the pattern that the droplets made on the dark wood of the table top. "I can't–"

"You have to."

He looked up at her, at Andromeda who had been his godson's mother, the grandmother who had raised Teddy for him. She looked like Bellatrix more than ever, her curls falling around her face as she leaned toward him and pressed her palms flat on the kitchen table. She brushed aside the shattered cup and paid no mind to the tea seeping into her fingers. "You have to do this," she said again. "Harry–"

"Let me talk to him."

\-----

Teddy was not the boy that Harry remembered. He'd grown, filling out his gangly length, and now he was as tall as Harry. Tall enough to kiss him without either of them stretching – they would fit together like puzzle pieces, one nestled against the other.

Harry stepped back until he was pressed against the high counter, his palms pressed against Andromeda's shining formica. "Teddy, you–"

"Grandmother said you wanted to talk to me about the marriage contract."

Nodding, Harry leaned further back as Teddy came into his space, reaching out and touching his cheek with a finger. He traced the line of Harry's jawbone and then smiled, his hair turning bubble-gum pink.

"I hope Grandmother explained that you won't have to take any real responsibility for me. I need a legal guardian under the new werewolf laws because of my father's blood, not because I'm actually dangerous."

Harry's throat tightened, and he nodded. Remus hadn't been dangerous, but the Ministry laws had persecuted him, too. A beast, a monster, a _thing_ not fit for polite society – he'd died for the sake of that society, and this was how they treated his son.

"So you see, Uncle Harry, you're the only one who can save me." Teddy put his hand on Harry's, leaning close enough to kiss him.

"I – Teddy–"

He put his palm on Harry's cheek, leaning in to look him straight in the eyes. "It's marriage or a silver-lined cell, three days out of every month. It's marriage or I lose my wand and all my worth as a wizard. Harry–"

Harry's heart fluttered. He couldn't look at Teddy. "Surely … someone more suitable, someone your age…"

Teddy pressed Harry's hand to his lips, kissing the palm of it and curling the fingers around the kiss. "You didn't say that when you were watching me wank me last week."

"I didn't–"

"Know that I saw you?" Leaning into Harry, covering Harry's body with his own, Teddy pressed his lips to Harry's ear. "I knew … and I liked having you there watching me."

Harry froze with Teddy's body pressed against his own, and refused to look at him. He couldn't do this – he _couldn't_. "Teddy, that isn't, that doesn't–"

"It does mean something to me, that I marry someone who wants me and not someone who wants to save me."

"You don't want–"

Teddy covered Harry's mouth with his own, with a kiss that demanded nothing but silence. He made no move to deepen or prolong the kiss, but when he backed off, his lips were still a breath away from Harry's. "I do want you, Harry."

\-----

Hands touching, fingers laced together – Teddy brought Harry's hand up for a kiss. "You won't regret it," he said. The sun was rising, light flooding Andromeda's kitchen and washing out the bright colour of Teddy's hair. "I swear, Uncle Harry. You won't."

"That's not what I'm worried about."

Teddy didn't know how to make a marriage – the complexity of melding two people, two lives, two houses – he was young enough to believe in happily-ever-after. Too young to know what he wanted, just as Harry had been once.

Harry didn't pull away. This was no fairytale, no dream wedding, but he had no other choices. Teddy had no other choices.

He let Teddy kiss his fingers, one by one, lavishing each fingertip with attention, sucking on them in a parody of the actual act… Harry didn't know if Teddy was a virgin or not, and he didn't ask. Everything shared between lovers, between spouses – no, better to have secrets than to expose them to unforgiving light.

Harry clenched his fingers into fists. He didn't want this – he _didn't_ \- and this was more than enough, this touching. Harry stopped Teddy when he came too close, when he knelt in front of Harry and moved to unbutton his trousers.

"Not until the wedding," Harry said, catching Teddy's fingers in his own and holding them. It wasn't right. "The contract … we need to wait for the ceremony."

"Screw the contract."

\-----

The wedding went on, in spite of what Harry said or forgot to say. The words ran together in his head, his vows stuck in his throat, and he was sweating. Teddy gripped his hand, holding him steady, and that was all there was to it – Teddy was the only anchor he had.

There was a Ministry representative. There were a hundred people watching them. In the next world, from King's Cross or their own version of paradise, the dead were watching, too. Harry's parents, Sirius, Dumbledore – Remus and Tonks. Remus and Tonks, who would have wanted Harry to save their son from the Ministry's law… They would have wanted this. Teddy wanted it.

In the eyes of the world, for better or for worse – Harry took Teddy's hand and slipped the ring on his finger.

The first kiss was as sweet as Harry had known it would be. He let Teddy lead, let him be the one to deepen it – and then he tasted Teddy for the first time, with both hands on Teddy's shoulders to hold himself steady. They stopped when Harry moaned, breaking apart to the sound of applause from the crowd.

Teddy's cheeks were flushed, his lips swollen. Harry held his shoulders and pulled him closer. "I – I won't touch you," he said. "You don't have to worry about that."

He wouldn't. He wouldn't take what was offered, what was wrong – for the sake of Remus and Tonks, Harry would keep their son safe, and that was all.

Teddy licked his lips and leaned even closer, close enough to kiss again, close enough that they touched, hipbone to hipbone and breastbone to breastbone. "I want you to touch me."

\-----

The kisses were like champagne bubbles, coming up to the surface with every toast, every clink of the glasses, every sudden jolt, and sometimes for no reason at all. Teddy touched Harry at every opportunity – twining his fingers with Harry's under the table, leaning close to kiss his neck, brushing a foot against Harry's calf, touching him again and again.

Harry stiffened when Teddy touched his thigh as he leaned close, offering Harry a forkful of creamy scalloped potatoes. "Please don't."

"They're good." Teddy looked straight at Harry while he ate the potatoes, making a sin out of a meal and licking every drop of cream from his lips.

"I don't want–"

"I think you do want me."

Teddy's fingers inched up Harry's leg, moving higher and higher until he reached down and caught them, holding them in place. "Teddy–"

Teddy twisted until he grasped Harry's fingers and then he brought them to his mouth, kissing them one by one. "It's okay, Harry. This might have been required, but … it's okay for you to love me."

"It's not that simple." Harry didn't love Teddy – he _didn't_ – but he wouldn't tell him that. Not tonight.

"It's as complicated as you make it."

Harry had been Teddy's age, had made everything easy – he was here now, and there was nothing for it. Teddy was his husband, for better or worse, to love and to cherish. To protect, and to protect others from him. Damn the Ministry.

Harry shrugged, yielding to Teddy. "If that's what you want," he said.

"I want _you_."

\-----

Through the whole courtship, Harry hadn't laid a hand on Teddy. He had ignored the pouts and the sly touches, the excuses that left Teddy's body pressed against his – had ignored it all. Harry hadn't reached out to touch him once, and that made the reception harder.

It made Harry harder, too. Teddy's body warm next to him, Teddy sucking frosting off his fingers, Teddy's hand reaching for him – touch after touch, it built until Harry was near his breaking point. He _needed_ this, needed Teddy. He wasn't allowed to want him.

He held back when Teddy pulled him onto the dance floor, but the Ministry representative was still there, a squat little man in a lime green cape. He reminded Harry of Umbridge, and he was watching the two of them. He would have locked Teddy up, if he could have done so … if Harry wasn't there, if the contract hadn't bound Harry and Teddy together.

Teddy bowed to Harry to start the first dance, bending down to brush his lips against Harry's fingers. It was slow torture, this dance – pressed against Teddy, pulled away from him, pressed against him, pulled away. Harry closed his eyes and followed the music and hoped. He had to make it out of this.

"What are you thinking about?" Teddy murmured when the music brought them back together. He laced his fingers together with Harry's and held him close.

"Nothing," Harry said, refusing to look Teddy in the eye.

His first wedding had been nothing like this – Ginny in his arms, soft and sweet with perfume, her belly already swollen with their first child. Harry was old enough to be Teddy's father.

Teddy touched his face, his fingers like feather-light kisses on Harry's skin. He felt good in Harry's arms – better than he had any right to feel. Harry held him closer, tightening his arms around Teddy. He had no right to this.

Shifting, Teddy steered them away from the center of the floor, pulling their dance to the edge where the shadows were broken by shafts of light from the chandelier. Between one beam of light and the next, Teddy kissed Harry.

"You came back to England when I was sixteen," Teddy said, pulling back to look at Harry. "I'd never seen anyone so handsome before."

"That was three years after Ginny di–" Harry looked down at their fingers, at the shadows between their feet, at anything except Teddy's face. "I know this marriage is the only way to keep you safe, and I owe that to Remus, but Teddy … I'm too old for you."

Teddy didn't kiss him again, but he held Harry as the song was ending, and refused to let him go when it was over. "Grandma told me that you never really loved Aunt Ginny," he said. "And Aunt Hermione gave me some books to read when Grandma didn't want to give me the talk – she's the one who told me that there was a good chance that you were gay or bisexual. Otherwise I'd never have asked you to…"

"It's not that." The courtship had been simple compared to this – a signed contract, an announcement in the Prophet, a few public dates, the wedding arrangements made and agreed upon by both parties – but Harry hadn't been prepared for this, for Teddy in his arms and Teddy in his life. "It's not…"

"Not simple. I know."

In the half-shadows, Teddy didn't look like his mother or his father. His cheekbones were higher, his eyes were a steel gray, and his lips were drawn together in a frown that made him look older. Harry closed his eyes. Leaning forward, he let himself touch Teddy – let his lips brush against Teddy's in the briefest of kisses.

\-----

Once he began, Harry couldn't stop. He pulled Teddy off the dance floor and out of the ballroom and down the corridor, finding a recessed alcove just out of sight. The sounds of laughter and music and clinking champagne glasses had died down.

"Our first moment alone as married men," Teddy said, his lips curving up in a smile as he reached for Harry.

"It's not – I can't – that is, I'm not romantic … Teddy."

"Doesn't matter." Teddy kissed him again and again, stealing Harry's breath as he worked to unbutton his robes. "I like you the way you are."

Harry had never felt this before, the thud of his heart and the tightness of his throat, the need to gasp for every breath. He had never – Ginny had never touched him like this. He caught Teddy's fingers and held them still.

"You don't know–"

"I don't know you, I don't know myself, I don't know my own mind … I don't know who I am or what I want, does that about sum it up?" Teddy pushed Harry back against the wall and then kissed him hard. "I know enough, Harry. I really do."

He rubbed against Harry, his breath coming in short warm pants against Harry's neck. Fumbling through layers of robes, he found Harry's cock and stroked it through the silk while he rubbed himself against Harry's thigh. "I know I need–"

Harry spun him around and pushed him back against the wall, pinning his hands over his head. He held Teddy there for the space of three breaths and then relented, leaning in to kiss him. This was _Teddy_, and Harry couldn't deny him anything.

Teddy. Remus's son. Teddy who had somehow arranged this, making Andromeda think of Harry as the only choice for his guardian, as a suitable spouse for him … this was Teddy, who had been sleeping at Grimmauld Place and walking around half-naked and wanking in the bathroom with the door left ajar. He was Harry's Teddy, now.

Each kiss was longer than the last, sweeter, deeper. Harry let Teddy arch up against him, rubbing their cocks together, touching them together – Harry slipped a hand under Teddy's robes and stroked him, touched him for the first time.

Harry hadn't done this – not with anyone since Ginny – had sworn not to do this – but with Teddy in his arms, saying his name with a sharp little gasp as he came, going limp against him–

"Teddy…" Touching him, holding him, tasting him, Harry came, and couldn't bring himself to regret it. In the long drawn-out moment afterward, he let Teddy keep him silent with kiss after kiss, languorous touches that threatened to make Harry lose control again.

Harry broke away at last. "We should…"

"Don't second-guess yourself on this." Teddy grasped Harry's upper arm, squeezing hard enough to hurt. "Don't–"

This was his wedding night, for better or for worse. It wasn't what Harry had imagined – it wasn't the fairytale wedding that Remus and Tonks would have wanted for their son – it wasn't necessary to make it perfect. "We should get out of the corridor where everyone can see us, and get a proper bed," Harry said.

Teddy blinked and his hair flashed a pleased-looking pink – almost the same colour his skin had flushed when he came. Now that Harry had seen that look on his face … he wouldn't stop until he had seen everything.

\-----

The bride wore white – Harry's Teddy, haloed in the spotlight they had rigged to light the dining room. He came down the aisle with all the solemnity he could muster, but Harry saw the smile he couldn't repress.

"Didn't need Grandmother to drag you to the altar this time, I hope?"

Harry elbowed Teddy, almost making him lose his balance in his high heels. "She didn't _drag_ me."

"Near enough."

"Have some respect for your elders."

Teddy dropped his bouquet and advanced on Harry, pushing him up against the wall. "When _exactly_ are you going to give me this fairytale wedding that you think I deserve?"

Harry spread his legs, shifting his balance to pull Teddy closer, and started to unfasten their buttons. "It might take some time ... rehearsals, lots of practice, you know…"

"Mm-hmm. Sounds good to me." Teddy's hair flashed through the rainbow when he smiled, and he helped Harry unfasten the buttons on his robes. He pressed Harry hard against the wall, kissing him and thrusting against him. "Need you…"

"I … take you, Teddy Lupin, to be my lawfully–" Harry gasped when Teddy slid a hand down his chest, his robes unfastened and falling to the floor. He knelt in front of Harry, looking up at him through the blue hair that fell down over his eyes.

"Say it, Harry."

"Wedded husband, to love and to honor, to cherish and protect–" Teddy sucked the head of Harry's cock into his mouth, a hand on each of Harry's hips pinning him to the wall. Each touch was like fire in Harry's blood, Teddy taking him, wanting him, needing him. He needed more.

The two of them went down to the floor, tangled in their wedding robes, thrusting one against the other. Harry took Teddy's cock in his hand, stroking it while he rolled over, pinning Teddy to the floor with his own weight. "Say it."

Teddy arched up to meet him, kissing Harry hard enough to bruise his lips. "You may kiss the bride?" he said, starting to squirm when Harry stopped stroking him. "No, please…"

Harry kissed him. "No … say it. Be mine, Teddy."

"I take you, Harry James Potter, to be my … lawfully wedded husband, to love and–" Teddy broke off as Harry started to stroke their cocks together. "Please–"

He gave Harry that look – the one that Harry couldn't resist – and Harry gave into him, gave into the pulse of the need between them. He let himself go, stroking faster and faster, kissing Teddy until they had to break apart for air, they had to breathe, they had to – they needed – needed –

Teddy kissed Harry then, after he'd Summoned his wand and Banished the mess, restoring their wedding robes to their usual pristine condition. He pressed Harry against them for one last kiss, rubbing the silk against Harry's body, and then sent them up to their wardrobe with a flick of his wand. "Love you," he said, rolling over to take the brunt of the hard wooden floor and settling Harry into his arms.

Harry took deep breaths, calming his racing heartbeat. He kissed Teddy again before pulling him up to press him against the altar. "Now," he said. "You may kiss your husband."

Ceremony after ceremony, wedding after wedding, again and again – practice made perfect, after all. Every time, Harry's heart skipped a beat when he saw Teddy coming down the aisle toward him. As long as Teddy wore his white wedding robes, Harry would be waiting for him at the makeshift altar, ready to press him up against the wall for a kiss.


End file.
